Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts

Saturday, July 23, 2011

LOOK Like You Want It

What did you do when you first laid eyes on your spouse? For the women, you probably just played it off as though you didn’t see him. For the men, you probably looked and continued to look until you got some type of return look from her. To this day my wife claims she caught me looking at her butt in church…saying that she could feel some eyes burning into her backside. Well…

How did you look at your spouse on your wedding day as you both stood looking into each other’s eyes? Was it a look of “I’m ready to tear your clothes off rite now” or maybe “I’m ready to start this loving journey with you and no one else”? Regardless of the meaning behind the look, I’m sure it was a look of “want” and “need” of the other person. It was a look to get your spouse’s attention…to let them know that they mean something to you.

As couples, we must continually show that we want and desire each other by looking at them in a manner that says “you are the love of my life and I want you”. Regardless of whether your spouse needs these consistent looks, it will let them know subconsciously that my spouse wants me.

What are the pros for giving “THE LOOK”?

1.Pro: Your spouse will know you desire them
2.Pro: Your spouse will have alluring thoughts of you being a promiscuous lover…which in my eyes is always a good thing in a relationship

What are the cons for not giving “THE LOOK”?

1.Con: There is no physical interest being shown to your spouse
2.Con: Due to lack of physical interest being shown, someone else might catch your spouse’s eye when they realize someone is checking them out

The 2nd Con is the last thing that any relationship needs entering it. You have to do what you have to do and make sure your spouse feels the needed desire.

So the next time you see your spouse, look at them like they are the only other person on the planet with you and you just found them after 1 year of searching the earth. See what the reaction is to “THE LOOK”.

Let us know your thoughts.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

What 7 Year Itch?

There is a saying out there that every marriage goes through a 7 year itch during the 7th year of marriage. I have always wondered what is the “itch” that some people supposedly encounter during this time. Is it an itch to be with someone else romantically? Is it an itch to have companionship with someone else? Is it an itch of being tired of looking at that same face every day and every night over the past 7 years? Or is it just a myth?

I always wondered if I was going to have a 7 year itch and if I were to have one, what was it going to be. Was I going to fall into some type of trance which would lead me off in a path of destruction to my marriage? Or would I sail through the 7 year mark unscathed of any negative traps that supposedly arise during this critical year of marriage?

I had to dig a little deeper into this one; so I asked my wife directly what she thought about the 7 year itch. She threw something at me that made complete sense. She stated that the 7 year itch doesn’t necessarily have to involve actions or feelings external of a marriage. It could simply be the need for internal adjustments within the marriage. Let me explain. By now, a married couple should know each other very well. With that, many monthly, weekly, and even daily activities run like clockwork…especially if you have kids which require some form of standardization with daily routines. Unfortunately, when something is done over and over and over again, you now have a recurring cycle. Eventually portions of that recurring cycle may honestly get boring.

What’s the catch here? The catch is that you have to catch this situation before it gets out of hand and before the marriage falls into a boring lapse of stagnation. If left unnoticed, that internal need for adjustment could potentially lead down the wrong path…the opening of the front door leading to the outside.

Well, my wife and I made it to our 7th year of marriage this year and we are supposedly now in that critical year of our life together. I can honestly say that no thoughts have come over me to leave my wife or step out on my wife or do anything that will dishonor my wife or marriage. Now with that being said, we consistently realize that we must keep things interesting in our marriage…keeping the surprises coming at each other…while at the same time maintaining the consistent scheduling of 3 kids. Is everything perfect? Heck no. But are we working towards perfection? I like to think that we are trying :)

All in all, I would say there is a 7 year itch only if you create it. My suggestion…don’t create it. Love your spouse in as many different ways possible…keeping things interesting and exciting.

Let me know your thoughts.

Take care and be blessed,
C Wells

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Is It "Air Tight"?

As I was traveling back from Mississippi to Atlanta this past weekend on I-20, I ran up on the back end of a heavy rain storm…and the rain was coming down to the point of only 30 to 40 yards of visibility sitting in front of me. As I traveled along listening to some old school Lauryn Hill, I felt a big drop of water hit my left arm by the door. First thing to pop into my head was “What the ….?” ( I thought it…didn’t say it). I immediately started feeling around the top seal of the window and door checking for a gap, or an opening, or even a wet spot to determine where the water came from. I even checked over my head around the sunroof. I found nothing. I pressed the window button (close) to see if I could hear some movement in the window to confirm the window was cracked a little…there was no movement. It appeared that all windows and sunroof were closed completely. At that point, I asked myself, “How did that drop of water get in the truck?”. At that moment, God schooled me on something.

There I was in my vehicle with all the windows closed. The many raindrops were hitting the vehicle as though they were trying to get inside the vehicle to consume me, but the vehicle was protecting me from the raindrops. Then the relationship with my wife and family popped into my head. There are so many negative items that try to attack us each day, whether spiritual, mental, or physical. With so many negative things of the world attacking relationships these days, we must have something/someone to protect us so that our marriages are not infiltrated. For me, I realize that protector is God. He is that vehicle that you can comfortably sit in and be protected from everything that is trying to get at/in your relationship with your spouse.

Ask yourself what negative activities/people/feelings are trying to plant themselves in your marriage. Once you identify them, ask for God’s protection against them for your relationship. I find that He is the best option leading to an “Air Tight” relationship. Note that I said “leading to” in that statement. While God is perfect, we as humans are not. Therefore, there is no guarantee that a “raindrop” won’t fall on your marriage; but with God’s protection from all the other “raindrops”, you can easily wipe those few negative “raindrops” off and enjoy the positive aspects of marriage with your spouse.

Just remember, God is your best option to ensure you have an “Air Tight” marriage. Use Him!

Let me know your thoughts.

Take care and be blessed.

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