Learn How to Be a Better Spouse

Do you think you know all there is to know about being a great husband or being a great wife? If so, please sit down and write out that manual and sell the first copy to me. I don’t think there is anyone living that can rightfully say that they know everything there is to know on being a great spouse. With that being said, every couple in a marriage should be permanently enrolled in the school of marriage. Simply put, couples must strive to learn how to be a better spouse. I would guess that this learning process continues until you leave this earth.

How do you learn to be a better spouse? Well, I can give you my thoughts on that question…and please know that these items are ideas that I follow or that I am trying to follow in becoming a better spouse.

1. Pray. (a) Pray for answers to the many questions that come up in your marriage. Pray for understanding of what marriage is and what marriage is for. Pray for the purpose of your marriage. Pray for increased wisdom within your marriage. Pray for improvements within yourself before praying for improvements within your spouse. Pray for any and everything that you can think of that will improve your marriage. An open relationship with God will allow Him to reveal many of the answers that you will need to improve your marriage and become a better spouse to your significant other. (b) Pray with your spouse. This may be one of the most intimate activities you can have with your spouse. Praying with your spouse may also be one of the most challenging for some…especially if you don’t have a solid personal prayer life established. If you are not completely comfortable with this, make it an extremely short prayer. Take your spouse by the hands and quickly say “Thank you Lord for my spouse and my marriage!” Leave it at that and then make it longer next time.

2. Learn from daily experiences. You and your spouse will go through something each day that may or may not challenge your marriage. It may be small or it may be something big. Regardless of the size of the event, you should make every effort to learn from the event to ensure that you handle the situation better the next time around.

3. Learn from other married couples’ experiences. If possible, it is great to learn from others’ experiences so that you can avoid going through a stressful situation. If you encounter a couple going through a negative period in their marriage, it would be wise to learn from their negative situation so that you don’t go through that same situation in the future. On the positive side, be sure to learn as much as you can from couples that have positive periods occurring in their marriages.

4. Read. While there is nothing better than on-the-job-training, there are many books, articles, and other media that offer very good advice on many marital subjects. One of the best books that give precise instructions on how to have a successful marriage is the Holy Bible. There are specific instructions on how a husband should treat his wife and instructions on how a wife should treat her husband. This book is filled with many accounts of marriages that you can read about and learn from. Additionally, there are other books written by today’s authors that give good insight on maintaining a healthy and loving marriage.

When you said “I DO”, a commitment was made to love your spouse forever. A commitment also should have been made to be the best spouse possible. How do engineers become great engineers?...how do doctors become great doctors?...they go to school to learn the skills to be a great engineer and doctor. When you get married, you become a spouse…something that you have never been before. What are you going to do to learn how to become a great spouse? GO TO SCHOOL!

Let me know your thoughts.

Be blessed and talk to you soon.