Home is where the heart is. If your heart is somewhere else, then how can you take care of what you have at home? If your heart is not at home, then where is it? When you said “I Do” on that day that you will always remember, you did not say these two words for nothing. I would assume you said “I Do” commit to be there with and for my spouse always. You may have also stated “I Will” during that very special day you were joined with your spouse.
“I Will”. The words “I Will” to me depict never ending action. “I Will” love my spouse always. “I Will” give my all to my marriage. “I Will” provide my spouse with all that I have. “I Will” ensure that my spouse feels secure within our marriage. Both you and I can go on and on thinking of more “I Will” statements that apply to what a marriage should consist of. The question that must be personally asked is…what “Will I” do in my marriage to ensure it lasts?
When you are joined in marriage with your spouse, at that point in time, there should be only one relationship more important than your relationship with your spouse…and that is your relationship with God (or at least that is the case for me). Other than that, no other relationship should come before your relationship with your spouse. Now please don’t get confused when I say relationship. I am not speaking solely of relationships with people. Think of “relationship” as “priority”. Now ask yourself, do I have something prioritized above my spouse?...is my job prioritized higher than my spouse?...are family and friends prioritized higher than my spouse?...is church prioritized higher than my spouse?...are my dreams and aspirations prioritized higher than my spouse?
These are questions that you have to ask your inner self. No one can answer them for you. If you are honest with yourself and realize that you have something prioritized higher than your spouse and marriage, you need to make an immediate change so that you can take care of your marriage…take care of home. This may require taking a break from an activity that you love or temporarily putting your goals and aspirations on hold. In extreme cases, it may require a career change.
You have to do what you have to do to make your marriage work and last. If you don’t take care of home (your spouse), you may not have a home to go to one day. Make a declaration…”I Will” take care of “home” so that “home” will take care of me.
Let me know your thoughts.
Take care and be blessed.
Help someone, encourage someone, pray for someone, pray with someone
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Time Spent Together are Memories Forever...by Wifey Wells
In relationships, time can get away from us very quickly. As couples, we have to deal with work, children, their school and their activities. Additionally, we have to make time to keep the household running properly… chores need to be addressed and errands need to be tackled.
With having all of these responsibilities, sometimes it can seem nearly impossible for spouses to spend time with one another. When we age and turn gray, what memories will we have to share with our children and our grandchildren?
Lately, I see how time has been escaping me and my husband. I do remember there was a time in our marriage where we made time for each other. Now, it’s really about the jobs and the children. With us adding to the family this coming summer, I can only imagine that us spending time alone is a thing of the past. This just isn’t a good thing for married couples. I admit that I am guilty of not making time to do things with my husband; but a lot of the problem is having someone to keep the children. I am one of those mothers who prefer not leaving her children with other people. There are very few people that we trust with our children. The people who we trust have children of their own, so sometimes I feel like we can be imposing. I think it’s just something that I have to get over personally because our network of parents don’t mind having our kids over. I know I can’t continue to use this as an excuse as God has surrounded us with so much loving support.
Last night, after putting our youngest to bed, my husband and I watched an hour of television together. I cannot remember the last time we did that. It was actually really nice to sit there with him in the family room while watching something that I really had no interest in. It wasn’t the television show that I was enjoying; it was the company of my husband that I was taking advantage of.
With knowing how important marriage is, I want to do everything possible to ensure that my marriage stays solid. I want to be confident in knowing that husband is always going to be my husband and my best friend. With this acknowledgement, I am going to make a commitment to my husband. My commitment is to make the time needed for “US” to have those moments that are going to be cherished forever. This in turn will not only benefit my husband and me, it will also benefit our children. Our children will grow to understand how important relationships are and how important it is to spend time with the one you love.
With having all of these responsibilities, sometimes it can seem nearly impossible for spouses to spend time with one another. When we age and turn gray, what memories will we have to share with our children and our grandchildren?
Lately, I see how time has been escaping me and my husband. I do remember there was a time in our marriage where we made time for each other. Now, it’s really about the jobs and the children. With us adding to the family this coming summer, I can only imagine that us spending time alone is a thing of the past. This just isn’t a good thing for married couples. I admit that I am guilty of not making time to do things with my husband; but a lot of the problem is having someone to keep the children. I am one of those mothers who prefer not leaving her children with other people. There are very few people that we trust with our children. The people who we trust have children of their own, so sometimes I feel like we can be imposing. I think it’s just something that I have to get over personally because our network of parents don’t mind having our kids over. I know I can’t continue to use this as an excuse as God has surrounded us with so much loving support.
Last night, after putting our youngest to bed, my husband and I watched an hour of television together. I cannot remember the last time we did that. It was actually really nice to sit there with him in the family room while watching something that I really had no interest in. It wasn’t the television show that I was enjoying; it was the company of my husband that I was taking advantage of.
With knowing how important marriage is, I want to do everything possible to ensure that my marriage stays solid. I want to be confident in knowing that husband is always going to be my husband and my best friend. With this acknowledgement, I am going to make a commitment to my husband. My commitment is to make the time needed for “US” to have those moments that are going to be cherished forever. This in turn will not only benefit my husband and me, it will also benefit our children. Our children will grow to understand how important relationships are and how important it is to spend time with the one you love.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Your Spouse is Not the Enemy
Having your spouse accessible at all times can have its challenges sometimes. Because of the close proximity of your spouse, you may tend to take your spouse for granted…not purposely. Also, not purposely, we may sometimes treat our spouse unfairly due to other situations experienced outside of the home that has nothing to do with the spouse. How fair and loving is that?
I know life can throw some hard balls our way at times…work…finances…sickness…loss of loved ones…plus many other life challenges. It is important to realize that in these times, your spouse is not the enemy working against you, but is your teammate…your partner…your ally. Start utilizing your spouse for one of the main reasons God put you together…as a Help Mate. Use your spouse to help you get through those tough days at the office by talking about the challenges you faced that day. Talk to your spouse about the pains that you feel or the disappointments you experience throughout the week. This should not only make you feel better, but it will bring the two of you closer as a couple.
As you continue to practice this within your marriage, you both will realize that only the devil is the enemy in any challenging situation and he can be defeated. Be sure to use your help mate…your ally…your spouse to defeat and overcome any challenges you face in life.
Let me know your thoughts.
Take care and be blessed.
Help someone, encourage someone, pray for someone, pray with someone
I know life can throw some hard balls our way at times…work…finances…sickness…loss of loved ones…plus many other life challenges. It is important to realize that in these times, your spouse is not the enemy working against you, but is your teammate…your partner…your ally. Start utilizing your spouse for one of the main reasons God put you together…as a Help Mate. Use your spouse to help you get through those tough days at the office by talking about the challenges you faced that day. Talk to your spouse about the pains that you feel or the disappointments you experience throughout the week. This should not only make you feel better, but it will bring the two of you closer as a couple.
As you continue to practice this within your marriage, you both will realize that only the devil is the enemy in any challenging situation and he can be defeated. Be sure to use your help mate…your ally…your spouse to defeat and overcome any challenges you face in life.
Let me know your thoughts.
Take care and be blessed.
Help someone, encourage someone, pray for someone, pray with someone
Friday, March 6, 2009
To My Wife of 5 Years
Baby Doll,
5 years ago we both said “I DO” to a lifetime commitment. I never thought it would be this exciting. We have had our ups and downs over these 5 years, but we have always come out on top of any situation encountered. I must say that there is no one else in this world that I would have wanted to experience those ups and downs with.
I would like to thank you for all that you have brought into my life…from the kids to companionship, from love to laughter, and for helping me build my relationship with God.
As we continue on this journey of commitment with each other, I hope I can continue to give you all that you deserve and need.
All my love to you,
Hubby
(Go to Proverbs 18:22 to receive your original letter from me)
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!
5 years ago we both said “I DO” to a lifetime commitment. I never thought it would be this exciting. We have had our ups and downs over these 5 years, but we have always come out on top of any situation encountered. I must say that there is no one else in this world that I would have wanted to experience those ups and downs with.
I would like to thank you for all that you have brought into my life…from the kids to companionship, from love to laughter, and for helping me build my relationship with God.
As we continue on this journey of commitment with each other, I hope I can continue to give you all that you deserve and need.
All my love to you,
Hubby
(Go to Proverbs 18:22 to receive your original letter from me)
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!
Monday, October 27, 2008
The Gift of Life
I quickly want to share my good news on this blog. With marriage, some couples choose to grow their family while others choose not to. Well, I just want to say that my wife and I will be growing our family by one. Sometime next summer, a new blessing will be added to the Wells' household.
I anticipate the next 7 or 8 months being another interesting journey. I know there is a lot to be learned during this process...as it was during the other pregnancy 4 years ago. I look forward to whatever comes...especially the daily husband to-do-list :(
That's all. Just wanted to share my news.
Take care and talk to you soon.
I anticipate the next 7 or 8 months being another interesting journey. I know there is a lot to be learned during this process...as it was during the other pregnancy 4 years ago. I look forward to whatever comes...especially the daily husband to-do-list :(
That's all. Just wanted to share my news.
Take care and talk to you soon.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Touch Me, Speak To Me....Only in Love
A week or so ago I received some very disturbing news. One of my former co-workers committed suicide. When I heard the news, my mind immediately raced to figure out why this beautiful young lady would take her life. My memories of her only include her smiles and that she was extremely active and spirited. I could not think of anything that would give her an inkling of taking her life. I was then told that her parents requested that no gifts or flowers be sent on her behalf, but they did have a request for donations. Her parents requested that donations be sent to a shelter for battered women. Yeah, I couldn't believe either. That was the last thing that would have cross my mind...and it still didn't.
Simply put, as a married couple, neither the husband nor wife should ever put his or her hands (or any object) on the other in anger. Why would you have to? We should all have enough self control to refrain from such behavior. We should have enough sense to walk away from the situation if needed. It's not about being "The Man" or being "Miss Independent Woman"...it's about being a man and woman of God.
Now you may be saying that women don't do anything to abuse men; and I guess that may be true most of the time with physical abuse. However, there are other types of abuse that women may be the culprit of...along with men. The Mouth/Tongue. The Bible says in James 3:5 "So also, the tongue is a small thing, but what enormous damage it can do". Verbal abuse can occur so often in a marriage until it becomes a normal habit within a marriage. Slowly, it can chip away at your marriage until you open your eyes one day and there is a huge open crater in your marriage.
In all that we do in our marriage, strive to be God-like as much as humanly possible. I know this is an impossible task, but if we continue to attempt this task, it will become habitual. Once that sets in, then it becomes a part of your everyday life to touch and speak to your spouse only in love. Any other way is not of God.
Let me know your thoughts.
Take care and be blessed.
Help someone, encourage someone, pray for someone, pray with someone
Simply put, as a married couple, neither the husband nor wife should ever put his or her hands (or any object) on the other in anger. Why would you have to? We should all have enough self control to refrain from such behavior. We should have enough sense to walk away from the situation if needed. It's not about being "The Man" or being "Miss Independent Woman"...it's about being a man and woman of God.
Now you may be saying that women don't do anything to abuse men; and I guess that may be true most of the time with physical abuse. However, there are other types of abuse that women may be the culprit of...along with men. The Mouth/Tongue. The Bible says in James 3:5 "So also, the tongue is a small thing, but what enormous damage it can do". Verbal abuse can occur so often in a marriage until it becomes a normal habit within a marriage. Slowly, it can chip away at your marriage until you open your eyes one day and there is a huge open crater in your marriage.
In all that we do in our marriage, strive to be God-like as much as humanly possible. I know this is an impossible task, but if we continue to attempt this task, it will become habitual. Once that sets in, then it becomes a part of your everyday life to touch and speak to your spouse only in love. Any other way is not of God.
Let me know your thoughts.
Take care and be blessed.
Help someone, encourage someone, pray for someone, pray with someone
Thursday, September 18, 2008
In Agreement...Prayer...Confirmed!!!
Matthew 18:19 says...If two of you agree down here on earth concerning anything you ask, my Father in heaven will do it for you.
In my last blog I spoke about how my wife and I came into agreement on a situation we were encountering and we both were sure that we would not get the outcome we asked God for. Well as that verse says...if two of you agree and ask God, He will do it for you. Well, He did it for us and He did it when we, earthly vessels, had every doubt that we would not get the outcome we wanted. I learned a huge lesson...don't doubt what God can do. Something that may take man months or years to accomplish, God can accomplish in days or even minutes.
Now I do believe that if my wife and I had not come into full agreement on what we wanted, we would still be sitting in the same situation as before...we would still be pulling in opposite directions, and who knows what would happen.
I am so amazed at what God just did for us and what He is continuing to do to us. Let me share the situation with you. Please bear with me and I will keep it short...
We've had our house on the market for a year and on our way out of town the weekend before last, we got an offer for the house and the potential buyer wanted to close in 2 weeks. We accepted the offer and requested that the closing be pushed out 1 more week...so we would close in 3 weeks. Well, there was one problem now...we, family of 4, needed a place to live in 3 weeks. Now, one would think that we could get an apartment for 6 months or a year (my wife's suggestion). Well, an apartment would not work for me because I am an artist and I need extra space to continue doing my work...just not enough room in an apartment. My suggestion was that we find a home to rent. As you can see, my wife and I at this point are looking in opposite directions; and we only have 3 weeks to find a place to live. That's where this story picks up in my previous blog where God laid it upon my heart that my wife and I needed to be in agreement on this and then we come to Him in prayer and ask Him for what we need. We agreed in the car on the way back home that we wanted to find a home to purchase. We had specifics on what we needed in and around this new home...neighborhood, number of rooms, yard space, and a few other things. It is what I considered an impossible mission. All I could tell my wife was...now that we are in agreement, let's go to God in agreement and ask Him to help us with this situation and then let Him do his thing. Well skip ahead 1 week and skip over the 10 or 11 homes we went out and looked at, we rolled into a very nice neighborhood and walked in a house that had everything we needed. That night, we faxed an offer in that was under the asking price and well under what the home was originally priced at. The following day, the seller accepted the offer. Now here I am thinking that there was no way we would be able to find a house to purchase within 3 weeks, and God presented this house to us in 7 days. That's how God works. He makes the impossible possible.
That's the blessing that I wanted to share and I hope to have my family in our new house within 2 weeks (prayerfully everything will go smoothly leading up to the closing).
I now realize and fully understand Matthew 18:19 and can testify on what it says. I am anxious and anticipating going to God in agreement with my wife on all aspects of our life and allow Him to move in our marriage, family, work, finances, ministry, and everything else. I strongly encourage you to come in agreement with your spouse in any area that you need God's favor and direction. Go to Him in unified prayer and let Him do His thing.
Let me know your thoughts.
Take care and be blessed.
In my last blog I spoke about how my wife and I came into agreement on a situation we were encountering and we both were sure that we would not get the outcome we asked God for. Well as that verse says...if two of you agree and ask God, He will do it for you. Well, He did it for us and He did it when we, earthly vessels, had every doubt that we would not get the outcome we wanted. I learned a huge lesson...don't doubt what God can do. Something that may take man months or years to accomplish, God can accomplish in days or even minutes.
Now I do believe that if my wife and I had not come into full agreement on what we wanted, we would still be sitting in the same situation as before...we would still be pulling in opposite directions, and who knows what would happen.
I am so amazed at what God just did for us and what He is continuing to do to us. Let me share the situation with you. Please bear with me and I will keep it short...
We've had our house on the market for a year and on our way out of town the weekend before last, we got an offer for the house and the potential buyer wanted to close in 2 weeks. We accepted the offer and requested that the closing be pushed out 1 more week...so we would close in 3 weeks. Well, there was one problem now...we, family of 4, needed a place to live in 3 weeks. Now, one would think that we could get an apartment for 6 months or a year (my wife's suggestion). Well, an apartment would not work for me because I am an artist and I need extra space to continue doing my work...just not enough room in an apartment. My suggestion was that we find a home to rent. As you can see, my wife and I at this point are looking in opposite directions; and we only have 3 weeks to find a place to live. That's where this story picks up in my previous blog where God laid it upon my heart that my wife and I needed to be in agreement on this and then we come to Him in prayer and ask Him for what we need. We agreed in the car on the way back home that we wanted to find a home to purchase. We had specifics on what we needed in and around this new home...neighborhood, number of rooms, yard space, and a few other things. It is what I considered an impossible mission. All I could tell my wife was...now that we are in agreement, let's go to God in agreement and ask Him to help us with this situation and then let Him do his thing. Well skip ahead 1 week and skip over the 10 or 11 homes we went out and looked at, we rolled into a very nice neighborhood and walked in a house that had everything we needed. That night, we faxed an offer in that was under the asking price and well under what the home was originally priced at. The following day, the seller accepted the offer. Now here I am thinking that there was no way we would be able to find a house to purchase within 3 weeks, and God presented this house to us in 7 days. That's how God works. He makes the impossible possible.
That's the blessing that I wanted to share and I hope to have my family in our new house within 2 weeks (prayerfully everything will go smoothly leading up to the closing).
I now realize and fully understand Matthew 18:19 and can testify on what it says. I am anxious and anticipating going to God in agreement with my wife on all aspects of our life and allow Him to move in our marriage, family, work, finances, ministry, and everything else. I strongly encourage you to come in agreement with your spouse in any area that you need God's favor and direction. Go to Him in unified prayer and let Him do His thing.
Let me know your thoughts.
Take care and be blessed.
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